Having Sex After Cyber Dating

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Slow But Sure: Does the Timing of Sex During Dating Matter?

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You Still Need to Have the Sex Talk You may be a little bit shy about beginning a sexual relationship with someone new , but you still need to communicate before you hit the sheets. The human brain and body do not just experience pleasure during sex; they also experience strong sensations of attachment and bonding.

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Simply put, we are hardwired to connect. Rapid sexual initiation often creates poor partner selection because intense feelings of pleasure and attachment can be confused for true intimacy and lasting love.

Early sex creates a sort of counterfeit intimacy that makes two people think they are closer to each other than they really are. Sexual Symbolism and Lasting Love Sexual restraint also benefits couples because it requires partners to prioritize communication and commitment as the foundation of their attraction to each other.

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This gives couples a different type of foundation from couples who build their relationship on physical attraction and sexual gratification. This difference becomes particularly critical as couples naturally move past an initial period of intense attraction and excitement into a relationship more characterized by companionship and partnership. As Dr. Sexual restraint allows couples to focus on and evaluate the emotional aspects of their relationship. The value of sexual restraint for committed couples moving toward marriage is best understood when couples appreciate that emotional intimacy is the true foundation of sexual intimacy in a healthy marriage.

Emotional intimacy exists in a relationship when two people experience a sense of security, support, trust, comfort, and safety with one another.

In dating, focusing on emotional intimacy is a process of coming to know each other from the inside-out, not just the outside in. By gaining a deeper understanding of emotional intimacy, dating couples can more fully appreciate the principle of sexual symbolism.

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Without this, sex is just physical and lacks the meaning needed to be truly satisfying over the long term. In dating, couples who hope to marry should focus on developing a foundation of friendship and communication that will serve as the ongoing foundation for sexual intimacy in their marriage.